Someone once told me the most important person in your life is you. And whatever you've done, you did for yourself. And the person who remains the most concerned about your life is none other than you.



Clouded with pessimism towards human nature, it is only natural that one would come up with a long list of “self-sacrificial” memories in attempt to defend himself / herself. It is very often scary that the true nature of someone’s spirit could be so selfish and dark- which is in contrasts to the noble, selfless virtues that we so often preach.




Among such in the list would be:

Things you do to satisfy your parents.
Words you say to satisfy your lover/(s).
Images of yourself you made-up in order to satisfy your friends.



We do what we do because we love the other party so much that we think it is worth it to do virtually everything that they demand of us, even at the expense of our own happiness and freedom- because they are the most important people in our lives. But if you are willing to take the view from another perspective,ultimately we satisfy people’s demands just to satisfy demands for ourselves. Whenever we put other people’s needs before our own needs, it’s only because we prioritize interpersonal relationships more than our own dreams/ principles/ ideology/ beliefs. Ultimately, we are just satisfying ourselves. But admitting that would be admitting that we are foolish, shallow, and selfish. So we conjure this noble, dignified image of ourselves in order to justify our so-called sacrificial actions. This way, we are not foolish, shallow, or selfish or at least if we are, we do it in the name of love.


So, in a mathematical expression:

(Words you say to parents, lovers, friends, teachers etc)+ (Things you do for parents, lovers, friends, teachers etc) + (Faith for your parents, lovers, friends, teachers etc) + (every other weird, bizarre, creepy things you do to yourself or others) = self-satisfaction


(With each factor not necessarily being mutually exclusive of the other factors.)



=D





But to all people I care about out there, this is not an attempt to demoralize you or to taint your beliefs towards human nature with pessimism, but as a reminder that your happiness could be a prerequisite in someone else’s life to be happy. And in times when you feel tired or neglected, take a break and tell yourself that You are the most important person in your life and you deserve better (at least for the moment, no matter how big a bitch you are).



I miss you guys. And its post-pms, so I’m just trying to make myself happy here.


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WARNING:

(Friends, skip this if you're not interested in my worldwide declaration of love to my significant other half.)



To, Mr Lau,


Thank you for the almost six years (and still counting) of happiness and joy you bring to my life.

and f*ck you for the six years of non-stop crap you load in my ears.


I love you nevertheless, perhaps even more so today than the first day i've said that to you.

So happy birthday, i hope your ass gets smaller, and your brain gets bigger! =)







Sheeling